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Psychology

Help inspires help, but family comes first

by Heather Allen

Neighbour in need: But we are more likely to help a family member that the person who lives next door.
Image: Adobe Stock

In our society, there are certain people who will always help others. You know the type: always there to open a door, carry shopping up the hill, maybe even get the shopping in for a sick friend, neighbour or family member. However, there are other factors at play in any given situation, which directly influence the nature of the assistance given. According to new research, the helper’s relationship to the recipient is key.

In her recent thesis, social scientist Dr Marlou Ramaekers of Radboud University researched the was in which social factors influence the help that is given to others. She discovered that, while providing help inspires others to do the same, we are more inclined to help family members than neighbours.

“Previous research primarily focused on the individual who was providing the help: the kind of personality that this person had, and the amount of time and money that they were able to devote to the task,” Dr Ramaekers said. “I think that looking at the subject from this angle is too limited. It’s actually our social environment that matters, as well as the person who is receiving the help.” 

There are plenty of people who occasionally help a friend, relative or neighbour with small, practical matters, Dr Ramaekers points out. Although this kind of help is not always necessary, it is still welcome. In scientific literature, this is also referred to as ‘informal help’, because it has not been formally organised.

Dr Ramaekers used large-scale questionnaire research to analyse the relationship between the giver and the recipient, the family and society as a whole. “Because informal help has no formal rules or procedures, the most relevant things when it comes to this form of help are actually the person who is being helped, what other people are doing and how they view this help and the people with whom they are in contact.”

For example, the study showed that there are different things that can motivate people to help, such as being surrounded by other people who are providing informal help, Dr Ramaekers said: “When someone provides informal help, it motivates others to do the same. And this can cause a chain reaction.”

At the same time, the study showed that people are more likely to help family members than friends or neighbours. “When it comes to neighbours, it turns out that it’s not only who the neighbour is that matters, but that their reputation within the neighbourhood also plays a role,” Dr Ramaekers said. “If people know that the neighbour is always willing to help others, they’ll be more inclined to help him than if he was someone who was known for never helping other people.”

Although it might seem self-evident that people are more likely to help a family member than a neighbour, it is an important finding, Dr Ramaekers pointed out: “When it comes to helping each other with small chores, neighbours are actually able to help each other more easily. People are generally positive about helping their neighbours, but by the same token they seem to feel less obliged to help them, even though government policies are increasingly based on civic participation.

“I feel that governments need to be more discerning in this regard and that they need to carefully consider those people who might be left out of the equation. If people are already less inclined to help their neighbours out with such small chores, governments should not simply assume that people will actually offer their neighbours more structured help.”

Source: https://www.ru.nl/en/research/research-news/seeing-other-people-help-out-makes-us-want-to-help-too-but-people-would-rather-help-a-family-member-than-a-neighbour